Year of the Boar, Eighth Month, Day 6.

The gods have not forsaken me after all. Unlikely as it seems, while I was in the bath house this afternoon, I found a small rock of opium wrapped in a piece of parchment. Whether it had fallen from my sleeve and I had not noticed or whether I had hidden it and forgotten about it, I cannot say but however it came to be there, I thanked the gods heartily and unreservedly when I found it. I had felt the need to be alone in the bath; tired after another round of verbal jousting with Izumi and afraid of what she has planned, I just wished to sink into the silky, perfumed waters and let them wash away my anxieties... I sent Nanami away to confer with Atsuko about packing my things and I slid into the water breaking the crust of rose petals the servants had strewn.
Eventually, after my skin had wrinkled and I began to feel cold, I pulled myself from the bath and pulled my linen towel around me. I sat on a low bamboo bench, shivering and wishing yet again that I could see a way out but no inspiration came. I heard a sound and startled, I jumped to my feet ready to hide myself if there were a need but there were no further sounds and after a few minutes of standing, tensed and ready to flee, I began to pace as if that would somehow still my racing heart. I slid the doors open and went to retrieve my clothing in the anteroom, I felt that sudden, familiar exhaustion overwhelm me and I slumped to the floor; my back against the wall and my legs splayed before me. My fingers scratched at the tatami matting underneath me and I picked at it idly; right there in the crack between the matting and the wall, I felt something. I pulled at it and made to throw it away from me in annoyance when I saw the parchment but something made me look at it more closely.
I am glad I did. Just having it in my sleeve calms me and very shortly, relief will come...