Year of the Boar, Twelfth Month, Day 5.

 Atsuko has recovered her voice enough to croak orders so I felt I could leave her for long enough to go and thank the gods for saving her. The fur wrap I wore was barely effective against the bitterly cold wind that whipped around me as trudged to the small shrine. We have been spared the onslaught of more snow but it cannot be long before it sets in. I felt ice in the air as I inhaled and tiny crystals gathered on my eyelashes although they melted quickly once we entered the shrine. There was a time when I would not have given a fig about intruding on another's private space but I hesitated to open the doors. I felt awkward, as if I were taking something that did not belong to me. Perhaps I am no longer the person I was...

Maki had carried the basket containing my offering and I had her set it down next to the makeshift altar and then I dismissed her. I removed the wrap I wore and prostrated myself before the gods. The ground was freezing and I felt stones digging into my skin as I lay there. I felt vulnerable and I did not like it but I knew that I must stay there for the appropriate time lest the gods decide to take Atsuko from me after all.

When I got up, I took the fruit and flowers from the basket and laid them in front of the icons before lighting two incense sticks. I murmured the sutras and then prostrated myself again, repeating the sutras for good measure. Ice seeped into my veins but suddenly, a strange, deep peace settled over me. I knew that I must bring my House before the gods in that moment and even though I felt a little ashamed to be asking for more favour when they had delivered Atsuko from Death's jaws, I begged them to deliver me, too. 

I do not know if the gods heard me but as I rose from the ground, it seemed to me that the wind whispered to me. Perhaps it was imagination, perhaps it was merely wishful thinking, for what I heard on the wind was a name... Airi...