Year of the Boar, Eighth Month, Day 2.

Nanami still refuses to speak to me other than to say that I should not go. Atsuko insists that I should and the Diplomats say I should prepare myself for the Talks; they seem to have decided that they have overreacted to Shigeru's letters and that there is no real threat. How little they know. I wish I had not decided to distrust Izumi; I so need a confidante. She is not to be trusted though, I know it. My hands have been trembling this morning as they have not in quite some time and I feel sick again. I am so tired of all of this. I have decided to send Chiyo for some weed. I need to feel that warm calmness overwhelm me and blur all my anxieties at least until I remove myself to the Summer House in any case. No doubt Nanami will have some sort of fit but it is I who Rule this House and not my staff so I shall do as I please. Speaking of Chiyo, I must remember to find out how her reading lessons are progressing... I must also make a list of everything I wish to take to the Summer House and in the mean time... I shall try to think of a way to trap Izumi...